My Tips for successfully living with an artist
Be understanding of the need. Creativity can be spontaneous or planned. If they start acting like a caged animal, then the time is near. The creative process doesn’t always play fair with structure and conformity.
Be open to all types of materials being brought into the house, it’s all useful, and purposeful...oh, and try not to touch anything.
Understand that it’s pretty much a losing battle to focus on anything else once the train leaves the station. Food will not be a priority; coffee is a must, and cleaning might not even hit the radar. Be perceptive, plan accordingly, and jump in to help.
Be curious and ask them about what they’re working on and really R E A L L Y care about their response. An artist’s purpose for everything comes from the soul. It’s a frustrating and emotionally charged process. Always keep in mind that artists tend to have excessive personalities, good and bad. They give all of themselves, all of the time. Foster the good and keep their dark side in perspective. Sounds cliché, but everyone needs the dark to appreciate the light.
Let them know their ideas matter, and their passion is appreciated. This is also in my top ten “how to be a human being” list, too.
Offer really constructive solutions when they ask for suggestions. I call this “spark talk”. A lot of times they’ll walk away when they get what they need from the conversation, don’t take this the wrong way. If they trusted you enough to ask you, there is no further explanation.
Not all ideas come to fruition, and for most creative people, the process is just as important as the final product. Artists have their non-judgmental “go-to” people. You’ll know if it’s you. They won’t always have the best timing when the need to share ideas arises, and they don’t care either. Creative flow happens.
Give them space. Not just physical space, but mental space. It can be overwhelming at times, and solitude helps. Again, don’t take this personally. Most artists have introverted personalities, and time alone is necessary. Take the time to understand the difference between an introvert and an extrovert. It’s probably not what you think.
Be patient. Artists are amazing, confusing, frustrating, and charismatic individuals. Their personalities can be volatile at times, sensitive all of the time, and often aloof. Try to channel this and avoid phrases like “you’re too this and you’re overreacting,” because they don’t help.
Feel lucky to have them because even though they don’t always say it, they feel the same about you. Trust them and cultivate their inner strength and beauty. This feeds their soul, and it will, in return, feed the souls of everyone around them.
2020